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【好書分享】筆記《英國上流人士都在讀的伯爵家書:外交官爸爸寫給兒子的80封信》

  在一個人的成長道路上,心靈的修煉尤其重要。每個人都想擁有一個成功的人生,但是成功主要取決於心靈的成長程度。一個人如果不注重自己心靈的成長,最後就會迷失自己,不要說成功,甚至最起碼的自我「存在」也無法維繫。

  人生就像一本書,一個人遇到的其實多數是挫折和失敗,怎樣面對挫折和失敗,怎樣讓心靈健康成長,是家庭和學校應該特別關注的課題,也是孩子取得成功的重要因素。

序言

  18世紀中期,切斯特菲爾德伯爵歷任英國愛爾蘭總督和國務大臣等要職,雖然在政治上成績斐然,但是他可以被後人記住的,卻不是他的政治成就,而是他給兒子菲利普‧斯坦霍普留下的書信。他寫給兒子的信如此率直而純真,充滿父愛和坦誠。從這些信件中,可以看出伯爵對兒子心靈成長的諄諄教導,他的許多忠告,直到今天仍然被視為真知灼見。

  本書從切斯特菲爾德伯爵寫給兒子的信中精選80封編輯而成,選入的每一封信都展現伯爵深刻的生活智慧。本書談到的學習、禮儀、處世、成功等話題,都是現在年輕人關注的話題,也是家長們教育孩子的關鍵。書中凝結的都是年輕人步入社會和走向成功必須學會的人生哲理,正如伯爵在信中對兒子說:「這是你初涉世道和踏入社會必須掌握的一些秘密。我希望自己在你這個年紀的時候,就懂得這些道理和準則。我付出三倍的代價,花費五十年的時間,才得到這些人生的真諦。在此,我毫不吝惜地將它傳授給你,希望你從中獲得啟示和教益。」

  在當時那個年代,本書曾經以手抄本形式在歐洲貴族階層中廣為流傳,被視為「一部可以使孩子步入高貴和脫胎換骨的神奇家書」。如今,伯爵的時代已經離我們遠去,但是書中所表現的人生智慧,卻仍然對人們大有裨益。

(序文來源:博客來)

作者簡介

   切斯特菲爾 伯爵(Lord Chesterfield,1694~1773) 英國政治家和外交家,曾經就讀劍橋大學,並且遊學歐洲大陸,1726年繼承爵位,1728年出使荷蘭,擔任駐荷蘭大使,1745年擔任愛爾蘭總督,1746~1748年身兼國務大臣等職位。他生前寫給兒子的信件數以百計,去世之後,遺族由數百封信件中挑出最具代表性的八十封,之後傳譯到世界各地,歷久不衰。

(作者簡介來源:博客來)

書評

我當初在逛書店時,偶然在架上發現了這本書,在短暫看過前後封面的介紹後,並沒有過多猶豫就將它帶著去結帳了,這在我買書的經歷中並不常見,而在真正翻閱過後,就更加慶幸自己沒有錯過這本伯爵的精華書信集。

在閱讀本書時,你彷彿身邊真的多了個愛子心切的外交官父親,在人生中的每一步都留下自己對學習、交友、人生等方向的經驗總結,並殷切的給予許多珍重的教誨,唯一的盼望的就是你得越來越好,雖然因為年代背景的原因,有部分建議的已經不適用,但整體的內容,還是足夠我們端正自己的姿態,重整目前的生活現況,及各方面努力的磨練與實踐,以便應付雄壯野心下的漫漫長路。

簡略筆記

   這本書如標題所見共有80封信,而博客來將這80篇目錄都放在資訊欄了,所以在這裡就不佔篇幅了,我會在底下放書本的連結,如果有感興趣的朋友們可以點進去看看。

   我自己在閱讀此書的時候,共選了我認為最重要的23封信並記下其重點,而今天我就先挑選其中的十封作為這次簡略筆記的內容讓你們參考,如果認為下面的重點內容還不錯,有想跟我拿到完整版筆記的人,就記得還要往下看規則喔!

第1封信:人生容不得怠慢

人生的旅途中要經歷必要且適當的困難,若是想要提升自己,就要學會理解這些考驗,不應該浪費時間耿耿於懷。另外,當你身處在團體中,無論圍繞在周圍的是誰,都不要讓人看出你的心不在焉,最好和這些人保持相同步調,經常表示關心。

第5封信:多交朋友少樹敵

一個人取得成功的最堅強後盾,就是處在眾人溫暖的懷抱中,盡可能獲取多人的好感。一個擁有最多朋友和最少敵人的人,才是真正的強者,這種人很少會遭人忌妒或憎恨,比其他人更容易獲取成功。

第6封信:堅定而得體地拒絕別人

迎合、取悅別人,並不是什麼壞事,但是對方是好人才可以獲得好的結果,否則就會被對方牽制,進而產生不良的影響,保持非敵非友的態度是安全的。

第15封信:給人生找一個嚮導

年輕人給年輕人指導,就像盲人給盲人指路一樣危險,要知道,唯一可以指導你在人生道路上順利前進的人,就是走過你想走的那條路的人。

第16封信:不要讓時間在廢話之間流失

你每天花在學習上的時間越多,就月可以越快抵達勝利的終點。你想要盡快獲得自由,就更要利用時間播下未來能成樹蔭納涼的種子。

第19封信:努力發現別人的優點

我明確的告訴你,一個人最糟糕的修養表現就是輕視與嘲笑別人,你要知道,三人行必有我師焉,所以努力發現並學習他人優點。

第20封信:規劃自己的未來

如果你想要在自己的行業有所建樹,事先就要下定決心做好充分的準備。首先,得先明白所希望從事的工作需要具備什麼素質,其次,要對自己進行審視,看自己是否已經具備這些素質,如果還有所欠缺,就要趕快提升。

第26封信:隨時審查自己的態度

要隨時審視自己對每件事的態度,是否受到慣性思維和各種偏見的影響,然後再重新衡量這些事情,並且得出公正且正確的決定。

第42封信:掌握必要的識人之術

想要全面掌握識人之術,首先就要瞭解一個人的主導情感是什麼,然後再深入研究它。同時,也不要忽略那些次要但是可以影響一個人行為的情感,也把它們列入研究的範圍內,對了解人是很有幫助的。

第69封信:將注意力投入到當前的事情上

你要記住,充滿自信和樂觀的心態是成就事業的必要條件,即使有時候需要暫時的韜光養晦與堅持不懈。永遠不要把精力花費在過去和未來,而是要將注意力全心全意的投注在當前,對眼前的事都不能專注的人,不可能有太大的建樹。

誰適合閱讀

  1. 未來有意願從事/現在是政治家或者外交官的人
  2. 剛出社會,希望有人/書能從旁引導你的人
  3. 希望能讓自己變得更好,讓思想、行為都更加得體的人
  4. 想了解人性和社會的人

氣質,是你現在欠缺的價值。

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領取完整版筆記

   如果對這本書有興趣且已經完成購買的朋友,只要在留言區放上此書封面的照片,並訂閱免費電子報,就可以直接領取到該書的完整版筆記啦!

   最後,如果有任何指教或者建議都可以直接在文章下方留言,也很歡迎大家到底下留言並分享交流自己的想法,我一定都會都去看並回復你們的,所以就不要盡情地把你的想法通通都丟上來吧!

   結尾還是要私心宣傳一下我的部落格「變身計畫」,這個部落格大多都是會以自我成長為主,不論是外在(美容保養、健康減肥、穿搭技巧等等),或是內在的進修(好書分享及投資理財等)等,希望在未來能夠和大家可以一起成長,願我們都能成為更美好的自己!

在〈【好書分享】筆記《英國上流人士都在讀的伯爵家書:外交官爸爸寫給兒子的80封信》〉中有 44 則留言

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